Religious moralism

Certain things make the hair on the back of my neck bristle. 
Religious moralism is one of them.

The pastor of the church where I had previously led a men's event approached me and said, "Hey.  Just wanted to let you know we received a complaint in the office..."

This was a church where I had led an on-campus men's retreat.  As was my custom, I offered the guys cigars after the session was over.  It helps dispel the notion that Christian guys just don't do that kind of thing, and lets the men know this isn't a religious thing we're after. 

So the pastor of that church went on to say that someone found out we had smoked cigars (on church grounds) after the event.  He said he, "personally didn't have a problem with that kind of thing" but that it could cause some guys to "stumble."  (Now, I'm not personally aware of a 12-step group for cigar smokers.) I also told him I never make it an obligation, only an option, for those who want to stay afterwards and enjoy a cigar and some comraderie.

The pastor continued by telling me we could go off-campus or to someone's house if we wanted to enjoy cigars. Well, isn't that gracious and accomodating.

When I, with neck hairs bristling, said this religious moralism was exactly the kind of thing the world hates about the church, he said, "Well, I have to relate to various groups of people in the church..." -- meaning, "Even though my personal convictions tell me there's nothing wrong with this, I'm too timid to confront the Pharisee that made the complaint."

Ever been in a fellowship or church where this kind of religious moralism became obvious to you?  Would this kind of thing happen if the biblical notion of a believer's new heart had been taught?